Archive for Women

Boko’s Harem

Bring back, bring back,
Oh, bring back our girls to us…

Dozens of women and girls from two villages in Nigeria’s north-eastern Adamawa state have been abducted by suspected militants, residents say.

The abductions have not been confirmed by the authorities, but residents say they took place a day after the military announced it had agreed a ceasefire with the Boko Haram group.

The government hopes the Islamist group will free more than 200 girls seized in April as part of negotiations.

Boko Haram has not confirmed the truce.

I think they’ve confirmed the lack thereof.

Say, I just thought of something…

Did anyone try saying “please”? I bet even Islamic terrorists like to be asked nicely.

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Is This the Little Girl I Buried?

Despite my carefully crafted, jealously guarded, image as a Neanderthal, I don’t really dig snuff films.

But I love the scripts!

A video posted on the Internet shows the stoning of a woman accused of adultery in the Hama area in Syria. In the video, an official from the Islamic State is shown administering the proceedings, at the end of which, the woman is led to a hole in the ground, where she is stoned to death by her father and other men present.

ISIS Member: […] This punishment is the result of the actions you did of your free will. Nobody forced you to do this. Therefore, you should be satisfied with the ruling decreed by Allah, and submit to Allah. Islam means submission and obedience to Allah, okay? Are you pleased with the punishment decreed by Allah?

Woman nods her head

Good.

He turns to the father of the woman

Is there anything you would like to say to your daughter?

Father: No.

Woman: Ask him to forgive me.

Father: I won’t!

[…]

I am not your father anymore.

I’ll spare you the family melodrama and cut to the chase:

ISIS Member: Tie her up. Put the blanket on her head. Sheik, tie her up.

Say that there is no god but Allah. Say that there is no god but Allah. Say: There is no god but Allah, and I ask forgiveness from Allah. We now begin the implementation of the first stoning punishment for adultery in the rural area east of Hama.

The woman is pelted to death with large stones by her father and the men surrounding her

Don’t confuse this with Islam. Islam is a religion of peace. Not the same thing at all.

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The Life Of Julia: 2014

Remember the Obama 2012 campaign ads about Julia, who travels cradle to grave on government subsidies?

How’s Julia doing today?

If “Life of Julia,” President Obama’s 2012 online version of liberal paradise characterized by cradle-to-grave dependency on the government, were to be revived, the Republicans might be the ones to benefit:

President Obama delivers remarks at the Democratic National Committee’s Women’s Leadership Forum in Washington in September. (Evan Vucci/Associated Press)
Julia’s grandfather has been waiting for treatment from the Department of Veterans Affairs for years and lives with pain. She liked the idea of Obamacare at first, but it turned out to be a nightmare to sign up and very expensive. She is now paying more than she used to for health care while her salary has been flat for several years. To keep up with expenses, she tries to take on extra work and rent out her spare room through Airbnb, but the city is threatening to shut that down. Her son, a recent college grad, is back living at home since he’s got a boatload of debt and rotten job prospects. Her younger child keeps getting A’s but doesn’t seem to be learning much; Julia worries whether she will be college-ready. The school choice program the state set up sounds great, but the Justice Department is suing to end it.

Meanwhile, her brother is getting discharged by the Army, part of the recent cutbacks. Having lived through 9/11, Julia is more nervous than she has been in a long time because terrorist groups seem stronger than ever and Iran may get the bomb. Ebola has freaked her out, and she has had to stop watching the news, which brings on panic attacks. With the Fed keeping interest rates so low, she is not getting the sort of return on her savings she counted on, and she’s worried Medicare is not going to be there for the long haul. The president sounds like a teenager — nothing is ever his fault.

More at the link. Great stuff. She gets into something called Reform Conservatism, which sounds interesting.

– Aggie

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Broads Laud Flawed Squad

Face it, ladies. He’s just not that into you (or vice versa)

Female voters powered President Barack Obama’s victory over Mitt Romney in 2012, as Democrats leaned heavily on social issues to rally single women and suburban moms to the polls.

But with two weeks until Election Day, the president’s diminished standing with women is quickly becoming one of the biggest liabilities facing Democrats as they struggle to hang onto the Senate majority.

In battleground states across the country, Obama is underwater with female voters — especially women unaffiliated with a political party — and it’s making it harder for Democrats to take advantage of the gender gap, according to public polling and Democratic strategists.

Obama “underwater” with women? Why does that sound familiar?

It’ll come to me, I’m sure.

Anyway, if I may offer my “chick-whisperer” insight, I would separate suburban moms from single women. When women turn from single and childless to married and maternal, their priorities change—they broaden, if you’ll pardon the pun. Single women have a single issue: abortion. Suburban moms begin to consider security and stability. They may still support abortion, and they may still vote Democrat, but if some of them, enough of them, see the world as the dangerous place it is, and how Obama and the Dems are doing far, far too little to protect we the people, they may just be willing to vote for a…Republican…just this once, if only in protest.

One side argues for border security, national defense, and self-reliance. The other side argues for… well, this:

I don’t usually feel my age, but nothing makes me feel older than the success (if that’s the word) of Lena Dunham. Unless she’s the female Chris Farley (betraying my age).

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VBH Day

With Nigeria’s announcement of a peace agreement with Boko Haram, there was revelry in the streets:

Whoops!

Despite government claims of a ceasefire, gunmen believed to be Boko Haram fighters attacked two villages and a town near the border with Niger, killing at least 8 and kidnapping others, residents told CNN Saturday.

Boko Haram has not yet responded to the government’s announcement Thursday of a ceasefire, which an official said heralded peace in the country after some five years of conflict with the Islamic extremist group.

In one attack, militants ambushed travelers in the Borno state village of Shaffa, residents of the area said, killing eight people and abducting others.

Boko Haram gunmen also stormed the village of Waga in Adamawa state, abducting a number of residents, including women, residents there told CNN.

Insurgents also occupied the town of Abadam, near Niger, after killing an unknown number of residents in their attack, residents said.

Nigerian officials said Friday that the government had reached a ceasefire agreement with Boko Haram, which has been waging an insurgency in the country’s north since 2009.

To launch one raping and pillaging raid after a peace settlement may be regarded as a misfortune, to launch several looks like carelessness.

Does this mean no #girls? That’s going to make a lot of narcissists very sad

Which almost makes it worth it. Almost.

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“Islam is a World Religion That Teaches Tolerance, Justice and Honor and Promotes Patience, Modesty and Balance” Watch

Yesterday, we shared a piece with you by a woman who converted to Islam—two months after the Islam-inspired atrocities of 9/11. She assured us that she condemned those acts, indeed all acts, of terrorism, bigotry, intolerance, and dishonor committed by “a few” that besmirched her newly-adopted faith.

I said then, and repeat now, that a person’s faith is of no concern to me. Just don’t pi** on my head and tell me it’s holy water.

Today’s example:

The Lahore High Court on Thursday upheld the death sentence of Aasia Bibi, a Christian woman convicted of blasphemy four years ago, as her lawyers vowed to appeal.

Bibi, a mother of five, has been on death row since November 2010 after she was found guilty of making derogatory remarks about Islam’s Prophet during an argument with a Muslim woman. “A two-judge bench of the Lahore High Court dismissed the appeal of Aasia Bibi but we will file an appeal in the Supreme Court of Pakistan,” said her lawyer Shakir Chaudhry.

Blasphemy is an extremely sensitive issue in Pakistan where 97 percent of the population is Muslim and unproven claims regularly lead to mob violence.

Two high-profile politicians—then Punjab governor Salmaan Taseer and minorities minister Shahbaz Bhatti—were murdered in 2011 after calling for reforms to the blasphemy law and describing Bibi’s trial as flawed.

Blasphemy, injustice, mob violence, assassinations—are we to blame these acts of intolerance on the 3% who are not Muslim? They are certainly only “a few”.

But no:

Over a dozen religious clerics, including Qari Saleem who brought forward the initial complaint against Bibi, were present at the court Thursday. “We will soon distribute sweets among our Muslim brothers for today’s verdict, it’s a victory of Islam,” said Saleem from outside the courtroom as the clerics congratulated each other and chanted religious slogans.

It’s Halloween in Lahore! Candy for all in this “victory of Islam”!

In a last effort to understand, what was the original charge?

I, Asia Bibi, have been sentenced to death because I was thirsty. I’m a prisoner because I used the same cup as those Muslim women, because water served by a Christian woman was regarded as unclean by my stupid fellow fruit-pickers.

That day, June 14, 2009, is imprinted on my memory. I can still see every detail.

That morning I got up earlier than usual, to take part in the big falsa-berry harvest. I’d been told about it by Farah, our lovely local shopkeeper. “Why don’t you go falsa picking tomorrow in that field just outside the village? You know the one; it belongs to the Nadeems, the rich family who live in Lahore. The pay is 250 rupees.”

Because it was Sunday, my husband Ashiq wasn’t working in the brickworks. While I was getting ready to go to work he was still fast asleep in the big family bed with two of our daughters, who were also worn out after a long week at school. I looked at them with love before I left the room, and thanked God for giving me such a wonderful family.

When I got to the field, around 15 women were already at work, picking away, their backs hidden by the tall bushes. It was going to be a physically exhausting day in such heat, but I needed those 250 rupees.

Some of the women greeted me with a smile. I recognized my neighbor, Musarat, who was the seamstress in my village. I gave her a little wave, but she turned back to the bushes again at once. Musarat wasn’t really an agricultural worker and I didn’t often see her in the fields, so I realized times must be hard for her family. In the end, it was just our lot to be poor, all of us.

A hard-faced woman dressed in clothes that had been mended many times came over to me with an old yellow bowl.

“If you fill the bowl you get 250 rupees,” she said without really looking at me.

I looked at the huge bowl and thought I would never finish before sunset. Looking at the other women’s bowls, I also realized mine was much bigger. They were reminding me that I’m a Christian.

The sun was beating down, and by midday it was like working in an oven. I was dripping with sweat and I could hardly think or move for the suffocating heat. In my mind, I could see the river beside my village. If only I could have jumped into that cool water!

But since the river was nowhere near, I freed myself from my bushes and walked over to the nearby well. Already I could sense the coolness rising up from the depths.

I pull up a bucketful of water and dip in the old metal cup resting on the side of the well. The cool water is all I can think of. I gulp it down and I feel better; I pull myself together.

Then I start to hear muttering. I pay no attention and fill the cup again, this time holding it out to a woman next to me who looks like she’s in pain. She smiles and reaches out . . . At exactly the moment Musarat pokes her ferrety nose out from the bush, her eyes full of hate:

“Don’t drink that water, it’s haram!”

Musarat addresses all the pickers, who have suddenly stopped work at the sound of the word “haram,” the Islamic term for anything forbidden by God.

“Listen, all of you, this Christian has dirtied the water in the well by drinking from our cup and dipping it back several times. Now the water is unclean and we can’t drink it! Because of her!”

It’s so unfair that for once I decide to defend myself and stand up to the old witch.

“I think Jesus would see if differently from Mohammed.”

Musarat is furious. “How dare you think for the Prophet, you filthy animal!”

Three other women start shouting even louder.

“That’s right, you’re just a filthy Christian! You’ve contaminated our water and now you dare speak for the Prophet! Stupid bitch, your Jesus didn’t even have a proper father, he was a bastard, don’t you know that.”

Musarat comes over as though she’s going to hit me and yells: “You should convert to Islam to redeem yourself for your filthy religion.”

I feel a pain deep inside. We Christians have always stayed silent: We’ve been taught since we were babies never to say anything, to keep quiet because we’re a minority. But I’m stubborn too and now I want to react, I want to defend my faith. I take a deep breath and fill my lungs with courage.

“I’m not going to convert. I believe in my religion and in Jesus Christ, who died on the cross for the sins of mankind. What did your Prophet Mohammed ever do to save mankind? And why should it be me that converts instead of you?”

Ohhh!! Why didn’t you say so? Now I understand. Tolerance and justice practically waft off the page. But to be serious for a moment, all it takes is the bigotry of “a few” for the “honor” of Islam to be sullied.

PS: I’ll keep tabs on this theme.

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How Do You Get to Mecca?

Take a wrong turn at Baton Rouge [kidding!]:

I am a Muslim, but I wasn’t always. I converted to Islam in November 2001, two months after 9/11.

Okay, I’ll give her credit. She got my attention.

I was 21 and living in Baton Rouge, Louisiana. It was a bad time to be a Muslim. But after four years of studying, poking and prodding at world religions and their adherents, I decided to take the plunge.

I am the product of a Creole Catholic and an Irish atheist. I grew up Catholic, then was agnostic, now I’m Muslim.

My journey to Islam began when I was about 15 years old in Mass and had questions about my faith. The answers from teachers and clergymen — don’t worry your pretty little head about it — didn’t satisfy me.

So I did what any red-blooded American would do: the opposite. I worried about it. For many years. I questioned the nature of religion, man and the universe.

After questioning everything I was taught to be true and digging through rhetoric, history and dogma, I found out about this strange thing called Islam. I learned that Islam is neither a culture nor a cult, nor could it be represented by one part of the world. I came to realize Islam is a world religion that teaches tolerance, justice and honor and promotes patience, modesty and balance.

Believe me, I wanted to edit this, but if this is her story, I owe her the space to tell it. I just wonder how a woman so full of questions came to the belief that “Islam is a world religion that teaches tolerance, justice and honor and promotes patience, modesty and balance” two months after 19 Muslims, inspired and sponsored by other Muslims, almost all of whom hailed from the Custodian of the Two Holy Mosques (Mecca and Medina). How did that happen?

As I studied the faith, I was surprised many of the tenants resonated with me. I was pleased to find that Islam teaches its adherents to honor all prophets, from Moses to Jesus to Mohammed, all of whom taught mankind to worship one God and to conduct ourselves with higher purpose.

I was drawn to Islam’s appeal to intellect and heartened by the prophet Mohammed’s quote, “The acquisition of knowledge is compulsory for every Muslim, whether male or female.”

I was astounded that science and rationality were embraced by Muslim thinkers such as Al-Khawarizmi, who invented algebra; Ibn Firnas, who developed the mechanics of flight before Leonardo DaVinci; and Abu al-Qasim al-Zahrawi, who is the father of modern surgery.

Here was a religion telling me to seek out answers and use my intellect to question the world around me.

With respect to those Muslim scholars of the Middle Ages, does her description sound anything like Islam as it is observed today in many (if not all) places, at least by some? For every Abu al-Qasim al-Zahrawi she cites, can’t we throw an Ayman al-Zawahiri (a doctor, no less) back in her face? If Mohammed really said “The acquisition of knowledge is compulsory for every Muslim, whether male or female”, how come Boko Haram and the Taliban, more Muslim than the Caliph, say otherwise, vehemently?

She gets to that, sort of, eventually:

It was 2001, and I had been putting off converting for a while. I feared what people would think but was utterly miserable. When 9/11 happened, the actions of the hijackers horrified me. But in its aftermath, I spent most of my time defending Muslims and their religion to people who were all too eager to paint a group of 1.6 billion people with one brush because of the actions of a few.

It enrages me to know there are some who call themselves Muslims and who distort and misappropriate Islam for political gains.

The difference is, when she gets “enraged”, she blames Americans for their prejudice and boorishness. (Paragraphs fill—and follow—the space between the ellipses.) She has nothing else to say about the “actions of a few” who “distort and misappropriate Islam for political gains”. You should see them when they get “enraged”.

My quarrel is not with a woman who found spiritual fulfillment. It is with a woman who has not been honest with herself, and certainly not with us, about what else her adopted faith preaches (“O Muslim there is a Jew behind me, come and kill him.”) and who else preaches it. I don’t know what percentage of 1.6 billion Muslims tend toward the Islamic State view of Islam, but it is more than “a few”. Just start counting.

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Chicks With Six-Shooters

I’m Bloodthirsty Liberal, and I’m reporting for duty:

Tel Aviv-based fashion firm is launching a calendar whose female models are also Israeli soldiers in an effort to promote its new line.

The calendar features scantly clad women who are, according to the company, “real soldiers” sporting the company’s military inspired apparel line MTKL, an Anglicization of the Hebrew acronym “matkal,” which refers to the IDF’s General Staff unit.

The company launched an Indiegogo crowd-funding campaign in order raise its profile and help finance its launch through the sale of the unabashedly racy calendar.

My birthday’s in June, by the way. Just sayin’

PS: If the IDF call of booty is your thing, knock yourself out.

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Sultana of Swat

We love Malala, the latest winner (co-winner) of the Nobel Peace Prize. Who doesn’t?

Besides her countrymen, that is:

Take that, Islamic extremists, anti-Muslim bigots, Pashtun-bashers and misogynists! Malala Yousufzai has become the youngest person to win any Nobel prize and, fittingly, did not appear before the media to respond for several hours because it was a school day, and the girl’s got priorities.

In Pakistan, news of the Nobel prize has led to an outpouring of accolades from official figures, led by the prime minister, Nawaz Sharif, who called her “the pride of Pakistan”.

Also among the praise-singers is the director general of Inter-Services Public Relations (ISPR), the public relations wing of the military. All this is as it should be. But officialdom has refrained from commenting on the fact that the pride of Pakistan is unable to return to Pakistan because the Taliban remain too great a threat.

One can only praise Malala to the skies. She’s a remarkable, singular young woman. But her campaign for women’s education in her native land has only come true for her in England’s Midlands. Where it was already guaranteed. Please don’t misunderstand: I also would have given her the award. In fact, I say we take away Obama’s and give her that one too.

But practically, her efforts, no matter how righteous, have been about as fruitful as his. Malala is a heroine. Pakistan is still a basket case. We feel better about ourselves, which is I guess what matters.

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Who Says Muslims Never Win Nobel Prizes?

I would have bet the house that an Israeli would win a Nobel over anyone from a Muslim country. Anyone want my rusty doublewide trailer?

The Nobel Peace Prize was awarded Friday to India’s Kailash Satyarthi and Pakistan’s Malala Yousafzai for their struggle against the suppression of young people’s and children’s right to education.

Thorbjorn Jagland, chairman of the Norwegian Nobel Committee, said, “Children must go to school, not be financially exploited.”

Yousafzai came to global attention after she was shot in the head by the Taliban — two years ago Thursday — for her efforts to promote education for girls. Since then, after recovering from surgery, she has taken her campaign to the world stage.

Through the teenager’s heroic struggle, she has become a leading spokesperson for girls’ rights to education, said Jagland.

According to the Nobel committee, at 17 she’s the youngest ever peace prize winner. The youngest winner before her was 32 years old.

Meanwhile, Satyarthi, age 60, has shown great personal courage in heading peaceful demonstrations focusing on the grave exploitation of children for financial gain, the committee said.

“The Nobel Committee regards it as an important point for a Hindu and a Muslim, an Indian and a Pakistani, to join in a common struggle for education and against extremism,” it said.

Heckuva job, Islam! Muslims the world over must be very proud.

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Lena Whorrin’

On my worst day—and as Grand High Exalter Mystic Ruler of my own Grand Duchy, I don’t have many—but on my worst day, I can at least thank the Almighty that I am not Lena Dunham:

It’s officially fall which means pumpkins, scarves, sweater weather and of course, election season.

That’s precisely why Rock the Vote is gearing up—with the help of several famous faces—to encourage everyone to educate themselves and make their voices heard in the polls.

Lena Dunham, Glee’s Darren Criss, Sophia Bush, Fred Armisen, Orange Is the New Black’s Natasha Lyonne, celebrity trainer Tracy Anderson, Whoopi Goldberg, Devendra Banhart, Ionna Gika and Gabriel Valenciano all team up for a special rendition of Lil Jon’s hit, “Turn Down for What.”

The twist? The new track is called “Turn Out for What.”

Rock the Vote Spokesperson, Audrey Gelman, told Buzzfeed that the organization hopes to drum up attention surrounding the latest hot-button items like marriage equality, global warming, women’s rights and much, much more.

“We hope that the video will connect the dots between caring about an issue and turning out to make a difference,” Gelman explained.

“Even in a year where the president isn’t on the ballot.”

That narcissist still thinks he is!

Anyhow, if John Candy and Chris Farley can have careers playing lovable fatsos, why not Lena? (It worked out so well for them.) I need to fight any inner sexism that lingers not to cringe every time I see her, which I keep to a minimum, believe me. In fact, let’s skip the sexist comments altogether. It’s not her doughy body that’s a turn-off, it’s her exhibitionism. If she wants to support Obama and Democrats, fine, she’s got company in the entertainment (to employ the loosest possible definition of that word) world. But can she keep her bouncy chubby thighs to herself?

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Girls Gone Defiled

The debate over abortion is complicated by two undeniable rights: the right to life and the right of a woman to control her own body.

We right-to-lifers (well, this right-to-lifer anyway) weigh the arguments, and come down on the side of the feminists who demand that abortion be safe, legal, and rare. Abortion will continue, but with restrictions. That seems to us (me) the only solution that honors both rights (or dishonors them equally). Does the right-to-terminate crowd make the same intellectual efforts at compromise of the uncompromisable?

You tell me:

If you would like to be filled with despair for the prospects of democracy, spend a few minutes attempting to decipher the psephological musings of Lena Dunham, the distinctly unappealing actress commissioned by Planned Parenthood to share with her presumably illiterate following “5 Reasons Why I Vote (and You Should, Too).” That’s 21st-century U.S. politics in miniature: a half-assed listicle penned by a half-bright celebrity and published by a gang of abortion profiteers.

You think that’s strong? Grab your Ray-Bans (with UVA and UVB protection):

A people mature enough to manage the relationship between procreative input and procreative output without recourse to the surgical dismemberment of living human organisms probably would not find much of interest in the work of Miss Dunham. But we are a nation of adult children so horrified by the prospect of actual children that we put one in five of them to death for such excellent reasons as the desire to fit nicely into a prom dress.

It’s not for nothing that, on the precipice of 30, Miss Dunham is famous for a television series called Girls rather than one called Women. She might have gone one better and called it Thumbsuckers. (The more appropriate title Diapers would terrify her demographic.)

I’m of a generation that went to college with women. If you referred to an 18 year-old coed as a girl, and you had your balls scorched with a blow torch. (Refer to her as a coed and you got away with a warning kick in said scrotum.) One learned to adjust, and those lessons stayed with one for a lifetime.

Have I lived too long?

Miss Dunham and likeminded celebrities think of voting in terms of their sex lives. Miss Dunham, in an earlier endorsement of Barack Obama, compared voting in the presidential election to losing one’s virginity — you want it to be someone special.

“I wore fishnets and a little black dress to vote,” she writes, “then walked around with a spring in my slinky step. It lasted for days. I can summon it when I’m blue. It’s more effective than exercise or ecstasy or cheesecake.” And that of course is the highest purpose of our ancient constitutional order: to provide adult children with pleasures exceeding those of cheesecake or empathogenic phenethylamines.

Miss Dunham’s “all about me!” attitude toward the process of voting inevitably extends to the content of what she votes for, which is, in her telling, mostly about her sex life. Hammering down hard on the Caps Lock key, she writes: “The crazy and depressing truth is that there are people running for office right now who could actually affect your life. PARTICULARLY your sex life. PARTICULARLY if you’re a woman. Yup.”

Yup? Nope.

Those of us who have been working against various mandates imposed by the Affordable Care Act are as a matter of fact attempting to extricate ourselves from involvement in Lena Dunham’s sex life, the details of which we would gratefully leave to her own idiosyncratic management. It is the so-called Affordable Care Act that has involved us in subsidizing birth control, abortifacients, surgical abortions, and who knows what else, for the strong, powerful, self-actualized American woman who cannot figure out how to walk into Walgreens, lay down the price of a latte, and walk out with her own birth-control pills, no federal intervention necessary. The very conservative editors of this magazine are in fact trying to make it easier for them to do so with over-the-counter birth control. I suspect that Miss Dunham does not know very many conservatives, so allow me to pass along the message: We really, truly, sincerely do not wish to be involved in your sex life.

Are you listening Sandra Fluke? (Very doubtful.)

I followed my feminist instructions in no small part because I wanted to get into their feminist pants. As some of my much-desired prey would be grandmothers by now, I am more inclined to be swayed by if not Ms. Dunham, at least some of her castmates:

Yet I am not. Juvenile behavior is never sexy, no matter how “easy” it may be.

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