What’s with the oxymoron, BTL? Jumbo shrimp? Military intelligence?
Muslims around the world have been posting sarcastic messages on social media, in a bid to counter a wave of hostility towards Islam.
First came #NotInMyName, a hashtag popularised by moderate Muslims to denounce terrorist groups, and their actions. “Al-Qaeda, Taliban, ISIS and 9/11… do not represent me bec my religion doesn’t teach hate & murder,” read a typical message on Twitter. The hashtag has been used almost 50,000 times in the last week alone, and is still gaining momentum.
The earnest campaign didn’t sit easily with everyone, however, and some felt it pandered unnecessarily to the Western media. “I’m tired of seeing Muslims rip themselves apart in apologies to prove their humanity to Islamophobes with campaigns like #notinmyname,” said one.
Soon enough, the hashtag’s satirical counterpart emerged. On Tuesday #MuslimApologies appeared, and quickly gathered pace. It has been used almost 30,000 times in the last 48 hours.
“Sorry for Algebra, cameras, universities, hospitals, oh and coffee too,” wrote one. “I’m so sorry for coffee, cheques, parachutes, chemistry, inoculations, soap, shampoo, cameras,” said another, and “I’m sorry it was a Muslim woman, Fatima Muhammad Al-Fihri, that established the world’s first university,” said a third. They soon spun out into the absurd. “I’m sorry he took his shoes off,” and “Sorry for inventing /discovering everything you can’t imagine living without,” were both retweeted hundreds of times.
Ha-ha. Okay, very funny. While you’re apologizing, my Mohammedan friends, perhaps you could express your regrets for razing all the temples in the lands you conquered (or otherwise defiling their faiths) and building mosques on their holy sites. Then maybe say sorry for mutilating females’ genitals—before or after you stone them, or kill them out of “honor”. You might then spare a remorseful thought for child brides and statutory rape. A few of you could express contrition over slavery.
Ubiquitous antisemitism? Isn’t that worth a “my bad”?
I get that you don’t want to be associated with terrorists, goons, and thugs—who would? But you name the place where blood is being spilled and the odds are overwhelming that it’s Muslims spilling the blood (and often Muslim blood being spilled). As long as we’re keeping it real.
But thanks for coffee!