I must have a fascination for the grotesque, the macabre, the ghastly. I am fascinated by stories of plague (Ebola), raping and pillaging (ISIS and Boko Haram), mass psychosis (everything Palestinian Arab)…
Strangely, it’s only the last that makes my skin crawl:
Lena Dunham has taken over the internet – at least when it comes to some of her fellow celebrities.
The 28-year-old posted a topless photo of herself to Instagram on Thursday, tying in both her new book Not That Kind Of Girl and a campaign to get people to vote for women’s rights.
The Girls creator’s naked selfie followed a series of pictures posted by some of Hollywood’s biggest leading ladies, who all proudly wore a shirt advertising the dual campaign with the slogan ‘Lena Loves Planned Parenthood’ emblazoned across their chests.
She captioned the montage: ‘These dream women stand for equality and justice. And they encourage you to vote November 4th.’
What Lena really loves is abortion, which is the bulk of Planned Parenthood’s services (as we’ve addressed before).
This is America, and Lena can love any organization she wants. (I love the International Cheer Union, “the recognized world governing body of Cheerleading”, myself.) But what Lena loves even more than abortion is Lena herself, all of her. She claims to be “not that kind of girl”, but I am hard pressed—no, let me rephrase—at a loss to explain what kind of girl she is. Other than dumpy.
And no, that’s not just my quaint Bloodthirstan sexism; it’s Lena herself. She’s a dumpling, and she sells it better than anyone since Joyce Chen. Again, that’s American greatness in action. I just don’t remember male American tubbos using their bodies to promote favorite political causes. Fatty Arbuckle on women’s suffrage? No idea. Chris Farley on gays in the military? Not a clue.
Now that I think of it, however, fat chicks in entertainment can’t shut up about their politics: Roseanne Barr, Rosie O’Donnell, Oprah (at times), Lena. I’m tempted to say it’s because they have their gobs open all the time, but that would be my quaint Bloodthirstan sexism talking. I’ll just leave it as an observation.
And conclude by saying this election can’t come soon enough. The less I see of Lena Dunham, the better. (I don’t want to see anything at all.) God knows what she’ll be tweeting in 2016. [Shudder.]
PS: We now return to more palatable subjects, like genocide and enterovirus.