First, SF Bay might be too cold for sharks, but perhaps we could provide a good living for a nice pod of orcas to hang out around the island, just as an extra measure of security.

Second, the paint job in the cells has to go. I recall this from my North Carolina days: a report had been published that putting disruptive persons in rooms painted pale pink had a way of calming them. Unfortunately someone at the county mental health or juvie facility didn’t hear the “pale” part so they painted their de-escalation room a shocking pink that would have made Elsa Schiaparelli proud. Needless to say, nothing was de-escalated in that room. So I’m thinking that there has to exist some shade of paint that if you look at it for more than a minute, your eyeballs bleed and your brain leaks out your ears, and that’s the color we should paint these exquisitely tiny rooms.

What? Can’t I have my dreams too?