Rag for Sale

As you know from the first of my many retirements, I have been looking for new and different opportunities.

I believe I have found one:

The New York Times Co. on Wednesday said it plans to sell the New England Media Group, including The Boston Globe and its related online properties, and has hired an investment banker to find a buyer.

The move comes more than three years after the Times Co. tried unsuccessfully to sell the Globe amid the recession and mounting losses at New England’s largest newspaper. Now, after a significant turnaround at the Globe and its online sites, BostonGlobe.com and Boston.com, the Times Co. is seeking to shed its last major outside holding.

“Our plan to sell the New England Media Group demonstrates our commitment to concentrate our strategic focus and investment on The New York Times brand and its journalism,” said Mark Thompson, chief executive of the Times Co., in a statement. The Times Co. has owned the Globe for two decades.

The New York Times brand? It’s second only to this one:

The Times Co. bought the Globe in 1993 for $1.1 billion, in what was then a record transaction in the news business. Within little more than a decade, however, the Internet began to erode newspaper revenues and subscriptions as more readers read news for free online, dramatically altering the landscape of the business.

Today, the Globe’s parent is likely to make a fraction of what it once paid to acquire the then-family-owned Globe, controlled by the Taylors for 100 years.

Bids submitted to the Times Co. in 2009 were low, about $35 million…

If the Globe lost 97% of its value in 16 years, imagine what it’s worth now. Aggie, I think we have a shot! If I sell my ’95 Volvo wagon and hock my grandfather’s broken pocket watch, I think we can swing a bid. I guess that would make me publisher. You want to be editor?

We already have correspondents from around the globe: the Jersey Journal, King County (Seattle) Chronicles, the Peach State Report—and who better to speak for Africa than Joe?

I would have loved to have Saul as our advice columnist (“Idtiots! Kill them all!!”), but he seems to have emigrated from Bloodthirstan.

But try as we might, we can’t gloat as well as Howie Carr:

Clueless fops wonder why they’re tanking

Who in his right mind would ever buy The Boston Globe?

Maybe the physical plant of the “newspaper” on Morrissey Boulevard, but the actual product? Let me put it another way: When was the last time you bought an actual copy of The Boston Globe? Why would you, it only encourages them.

Has ever a publication fallen so far, so fast?

It’s the Carnival Triumph of the newspaper business.

And these broadsheet fops wonder why they’re going out of business. All they print is agit-prop for the Democratic Party. They afflict the afflicted and comfort the comfortable. Just ask Deval Patrick and the Massachusetts judiciary. The judges spoon-fed them a recycled story on the Probation Department, and the throne-sniffers thought they’d hit the Pulitzer jackpot. Uncle Pinch Sulzberger would put the fix in.

I’ve got news for them. Uncle Pinch has left the building, $1.1 billion lighter than when he walked in. And the blue-blooded rumpswabs who are still there, cringing under their desks, will soon be following him out the door, once and for all.

Howie always refers to the Globies as “bow-tied bum-kissers”. It’s a nice image, but not an inventive one. It is literally true.

3 Comments »

  1. Bloodthirsty Liberal said,

    February 21, 2013 @ 8:55 am

    I agree, we can afford it. But what would we do with it? The property is the best part. Should we do an indoor water park for the kiddies (but not so-called “British” kiddies… see above). Something to make winter in New England more like Florida? Wouldn’t it be fun to call it BloodthirstanLand? The Bloodthirsty Times? Bloodthirstan-on-the-Beach? “Reporters” could serve snow cones and clean the rest rooms. I bet we’d make more money than they make selling rags.

    - Aggie

  2. Bloodthirsty Liberal said,

    February 21, 2013 @ 9:48 am

    We could call it Not The Boston Globe and raise its journalistic standards 200% in a trice.

  3. Buck O'Fama said,

    February 21, 2013 @ 3:31 pm

    The Boston Globular Thing for sale? Maybe they can put some solar panels on the roof and King Putts can sell it as a green energy company.

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