Vote the Slut, Not the Tut!

First of all, let me apologize for my deeply offensive remarks toward Ms. Fluke. They in no way represent the opinion of the Grand Duchy of Bloodthirstan or any Bloodthirstani citizens.

But would you rather I had written Vote for Fluke, Not the F**k?

Time has nominated the new face of birth control as their “Person of the Year 2012.”

Sandra Fluke — the recently graduated 31-year-old Georgetown law student who rose to prominence this year after she advocated for free-birth control before Congress and radio host Rush Limbaugh called her a “slut” — is now one of 40 nominations for Time Magazine’s annual honor.

She is joined on Time’s candidate list by 2008 Person of the Year President Obama, former presidential candidate Mitt Romney, Secretary of State Hillary Clinton, 1992?s Man of the Year and former President Bill Clinton, Egyptian President Mohamed Morsi, and Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu among others.

While Time editors will choose the Person of the Year, people can vote on the selections. Voting closes on Dec. 12 and the winner will be announced on Dec. 14.

I’ve been awfully hard on Ms. Fluke myself. (Oh dear, the double entendres are hard to avoid, aren’t they?) The absurdity of a 31-year-old law student demanding a Catholic institution pay for her birth control brought out the beast in me. I am old enough to remember when real women didn’t need a man (or a paternal state) to take care of them.

Loath as I was to be dragged into her sex life, however, I would rather watch her wedding night video (when and if she submits herself to that degrading institution) than even think about any of the others engaging in carnal activities.

Before you judge me, think about it.

Is it even close? One, you want to shout: take it all off! The other, you want to shout: shut the [bleep] up!

Last year Time named “The Protester” as Person of the Year, so it has to be someone of bogus significance and marginal relevance. I’d say Ms. Fluke has as good a shot as anyone.

1 Comment »

  1. Buck O'Fama said,

    November 27, 2012 @ 4:26 pm

    When I was young, I loved reading MAD magazine. MAD used to have a running joke about people being embarrassed to be seen reading it so they would hide it under a copy of Time or Newsweek. These days (if I read the POS) I would hide my Time under a copy of MAD. Newsweek – well, Schumpeter’s creative destruction has taken care of that problem.

RSS feed for comments on this post · TrackBack URI

Leave a Comment